Monday, October 09, 2006
In the life of a military spouse, we learn to live with fear. We push it away to the back of our heads, we keep ourselves INSANELY busy to the point of exhaustion, because that is the ONLY way we sleep at night while our soldiers are away. In the quiet moments, we hear our thoughts... we dream of homecoming, the signs we will make, the first moment in our soldier's arms after being apart for a year, and finally taking in a whiff of their scent that ACTUALLY belongs to them and not the replacement we have made AKA his pillow with his cologne on it. Then just as we get that smile, we remember where they are. We remember the danger. We remember the blood they will see, and the dirt they will taste. We fear the changes coming, because inevitably there will be change. We just pray it is a change that can be faced by two and not a change forcing us to face it alone. This fear is overwhelming. IT grips your throat and chokes you. IT sits upon your chest waiting to suffocate you. This is the TRUE life of a military spouse. The only thing that saves us is the friendships, our families, and God. Those quiet moments of prayer, the journals we write in to keep from unloading our heavy burdens on our soldiers so far away with much more on their minds. The next time you meet a military spouse, either current or past, think of this, and thank them for their bravery and service to their soldiers. Being a military spouse may not be the hardest job in the military, but it is MUCH more than coffees, gossip groups, and shopping at the PX.
In honor of all of those spouses that have had to face their worst fears... God be with you all.
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